For women who want more than gentle
A blindfold, rope around your wrists, and someone who knows exactly when to push and when not to. Twenty-five years of experience, and your limit as the only limit.
Probably not for the first time. You have read the stories, been through the forums, maybe a book you turned face down the second someone sat down beside you. By now you know what the letters stand for. What you do not know is how it feels when someone takes your wrist and you notice you are not pulling it back.
That gap I can close. Not with another story, but with an evening where you have to work nothing out. You open the door, and from that moment I take over. You keep one thing: the word that stops everything.
And no, you do not have to know what you want. Most women who message me only know that they are curious and that they talk to nobody about it. That is enough to start with.
I have been in the BDSM world since 1990. Privately at first, then at play parties, workshops and in the scene, and for years now as a paid dominant for women and couples. Bondage and shibari, whips from soft to sharp, breath play, electro, needles, wax. I took courses for it, because part of this is technique and you do not learn technique by being kind.
Alongside that I worked for years as a psychotherapist, with women. That combination is where the difference sits. I can see from your breathing whether you want to go deeper or whether your head is still in the way, and I know that the difference between those two decides whether you still think this was a good idea tomorrow.
I am tall, calm and I laugh easily. A session with me is intense, and there is also plain laughter in it. Anyone who says it all has to be heavy is doing it wrong.
Where are you
You have never done anything and you are terrified of doing it wrong. You cannot. A first time is gentler than what you are picturing now: a blindfold, some light rope, a feather. I build it slowly and you need to be able to do nothing at all.
You know exactly where your fantasy sits and you have never said it out loud. With me you can. Few of them still surprise me, and I have no opinion about yours. We start where you already are, not at zero.
You have lost a dom or never found one, and you are tired of training someone. With me you explain nothing. Whips, canes, breath play, needles, a build that actually goes somewhere. Say what you are after and I deliver it.
You want to try something that needs a third person who knows what he is doing. I run the session and the two of you set the roles beforehand. Watching is fine, joining in is fine, and what stays between you stays between you.
Your week is full of decisions. At home, at work, for everyone around you. You are the one who sorts it out, and you are good at it, and that is exactly why you are here.
The moment the rope pulls tight all of that drops away. There is nothing left to sort out. All you can do is feel what is happening and wait for what comes. Your breathing slows, your shoulders drop, and a quiet arrives in your head that people normally book a retreat for.
Then comes the rest. A feather, an ice cube, warm wax running slowly across your stomach. The first strike that lands harder in your head than on your skin. I build that at a pace that carries you rather than ambushes you, and I read from your body when I can go further.
Many women describe it afterwards as falling. Not frightened falling. Falling while you know someone is standing there.
My experience with Victor was fantastic! Our first play was intense and enriching for me. Finally someone with whom this part of myself is allowed to exist and with whom I can explore this part further.Read Nadine's full reviewShow less
My experience with Victor was fantastic! After years of doubting whether or not I would do anything with BDSM, I decided to take the leap, but as controlled as possible. And that’s how I eventually ended up with Victor.
I was incredibly nervous the first time, and it was so wonderful to notice that he picked up on that and gave me the space and time to settle in calmly. After that he took control, but in such a lovely way that I only wanted more of it.
Our first play was intense and enriching for me. Finally someone with whom this part of myself is allowed to exist and with whom I can explore this part further. By now we’ve played a few more times, and every time he manages to surprise me, boundaries are explored and new territory is discovered. And I’m looking forward to a next meeting!
Even so, I felt at home with him right away. You're allowed to be here, exactly as you are. I never thought I would ever experience bdsm in such a safe, loving way.Read Jasmijn's full reviewShow less
When I stepped into the world of BDSM, Victor crossed my path almost immediately. After a while of online contact, we arranged to meet, and oh, how exciting I found it, out of my comfort zone. Even so, I felt at home with him right away. He saw that I was nervous and I got to settle in first, he looked at me, sensed me and responded to that. A little feeling each other out, talking, being loving with each other because it’s so important… respect for each other and each other’s boundaries. He really takes his time for that. You’re allowed to be here, exactly as you are.
He gave me the trust to surrender myself to him completely and safely. And what a joy, that feeling of surrender and then receiving whatever it is you desire. He keeps an eye on every little sigh, every movement, even when you no longer know it yourself, he does. I never thought I would ever experience bdsm in such a safe, loving way. I recommend that everyone who wants to try this, or precisely if you’re already experienced, do it with him. His many years of experience make for exactly the right approach for you personally, but his insight into people also makes it even more personal and therefore even more special. His whole presence and tone make you feel secure, it’s good, and even when you doubt something, he listens to you, is there for you and thinks along with you.
Personally I find growth very important and I knew I had a path to walk there. Because I had always learned that the world and the people outside myself influenced my emotions and I allowed that, within bdsm I learned a very important lesson about myself: that only I could influence my inner world. Pain or discomfort usually isn’t pleasant, but mentally it meant I had to pay attention to my breathing and stamina to be able to handle a session. Stepping out of a certain comfort zone, and each time it went better and I could shift pain and a boundary, I felt proud of myself, I felt my own strength set in motion, what I was capable of. Through the sessions with him, I learned to draw this feeling out of myself. Something I now reap the fruits of, to handle other things in life better and to see them differently too. I feel much freer and a better person for myself and for those around me. I’m so glad he was able to help me with that and still does.
Apart from that, because of our dynamic I also find it incredibly hot, the challenge, the playfulness, the fun you have together, basking in the afterglow and lovely recovery in each other’s arms… switching off the world for a moment. I’d do it all another 100 times. I got so much back for it, in so many ways. Thank you for this intense and beautiful experience… a place where I can moor in my safe harbor, my coming home. Because that’s how it feels to me! It’s all worth it, of course this is a personal experience, but one that opened so many doors for me.
It’s the person and the intention put into it that creates such a unique experience, as well as your own willingness to surrender, in what you desire to receive from him. And honestly, one look from this man is enough. You’ll go to the ground, and not because he demands it of you, but because you desire it yourself. And that’s where it all begins… there aren’t many like him.
First we message. You tell me what you are curious about and where you absolutely do not want to go, and if you cannot name that yet I help you with questions. The practical things come up there too: where, how long, and the word you stop with.
Then I am at your door. Black suit, large bag. We pour something and talk briefly, because I want to hear your voice before I touch you. You are nervous. That belongs here and it lasts about ten minutes.
After that it turns. A blindfold, a hand on the back of your neck, and the conversation is over. From there I set the pace and you have nothing left to decide except whether you stop. I do not ask every two minutes whether you are alright, because that pulls you out each time. I watch your skin, your breath and your hands, and I read it there.
At the end you lie against me until your head is back. That takes longer than you expect and it belongs to the evening as much as the rest of it.
Laura
Coming home to yourself, so skeptical but it turned out to be so true. My first steps on the path of BDSM, so very much searching. The emphasis on confidentiality, privacy and respect for boundaries was also really striking, so that nothing was left undiscussed. Victor already knows what you want and senses it before you do yourself.Read Laura's full reviewShow less
Coming home to yourself, so skeptical but it turned out to be so true. My first steps on the path of BDSM, so very much searching. The emphasis on confidentiality, privacy and respect for boundaries was also really striking, so that nothing was left undiscussed.
The contact before, during and after my experience was great, which made the experience of being submissive, in the bondage combined with breathplay, super hot. I didn’t know you could get so horny and aroused from this. The blowjob was a challenge combined with deepthroat, which was indescribably good. Fucking after foreplay like that is so different, wonderful.
The psychological aspect before, during and after should definitely not be forgotten. Victor already knows what you want and senses it before you do yourself. Thanks for this experience and until a next time.
The most exciting thing about BDSM is that you hand over control. That only works if the person receiving it can handle it.
Beforehand we fix three things: what you want to try, what absolutely does not happen, and your safeword. Those hard limits are settled the moment they are spoken. I do not cross them because it is getting exciting, and I do not cross them because you shout something else halfway through, which is precisely what the whole thing turns on.
Technique is part of that. Rope belongs nowhere near a nerve. A cane is not a paddle and you feel the difference days later. I do breath play because I know how, not because it looks impressive.
And aftercare does not stop when I am out the door. Subdrop sometimes arrives two days later, as a flat day you cannot place. You can message me then. That is part of what you pay for.
Sometimes she wants this and he cannot give it. Sometimes he wants to watch. Sometimes you both want to try something that needs a third person who knows what he is doing.
I come as the one who runs the session, not as the one who comes between you. We agree beforehand exactly who does what, who may watch from where, and what stays between the two of you. I know cuckold and hotwife dynamics well, and I know the version where you both end up on my side of the room.
Something else I notice: the conversation beforehand often does more for a relationship than the evening itself. You say things out loud that have been sitting in your heads for years.
You do not have to decide anything now. Send a message, ask your question, and see how it feels to tell it for the first time to someone who does not blink.
Curious now
No obligation, discreet, and nothing is fixed yet. I read your message myself, and you usually hear back within a few hours.
A woman or a couple? Lovely that you are here, I would love to speak with you.